Saturday, September 15, 2012

THE ROAD YET TAKEN

As a student pursuing my graduation in Shillong during the late Nineties, I routinely pass through some parts of Assam on several moonlit nights. Since the Night Super (Bus) starts from Shillong a little before or after sunset, it was almost always dark by the time we reach Jorabat and descend to the plains of Assam. Being hard hit by weakness of the bowel around the time, I use to sleep or pretend to do so all through the way home till Churachandpur, to avoid throwing up or lessen the chance of one. Therefore, on account of the darkness and state of sedation, I hardly saw or experience sight of the places we were passing through. The only place which I cannot fail to remember was the mandatory stop at Jakhlabanda for food and a short break. Jakhlabanda, with its blazing sounds and well-lighted environs was a buzz of activity and commotion as several passenger buses stop by almost the same time in the middle of the night. On recall, I also remember the old Bollywood songs played all along the way which slowly change to Manipuri Leela on entering Manipur. However, one poignant theme cease to disappear from the mind’s eye even after many long years. It is the sight of dimly lit homes in the far distance. The lights from the distant dwellings appear faint and lonely from afar. I use to imagine about the wearied and humble souls that must be resting beneath the roofs after the day’s toil. The sight evoked nostalgia and brought the feeling of home from a distance.

During those days, it never occurred to me that one day I would be travelling through the same road again on completing my degree course. But that is what I have been doing exactly for the last couple of years or so, though in a slightly different circumstance, and which is still continuing. Having got my initial posting in Dibrugarh, the journey to and fro Guwahati has become a routine affair on one official pretext or another. The remarkable difference, though, is that the present travels are completed during the daytime and not at night. Unlike in public transport system, one can also schedule the time of departure and arrival according to convenience. Another difference can be that, those days, the journey involves travelling along two different stretches of National Highways, namely, NH-37 (Jorabat to Numaligarh) and NH-39 (Numaligarh to Imphal). Presently, the journey is restricted to only NH-37 stretch from Dibrugarh to Guwahati and vice-versa . Yet, another important difference is that now I can manage to view the sights and scenes along the roadside and the distance too, as far as the eye can see. I can also afford better and closer view of the lust green tea gardens. It is also clear now that the entire stretch of Highway is lined with human habitations, of villages and towns…a far cry from the imagined wilderness. The silence and quiet of the long night is gone. The entire 9 or 10 hr drive to Guwahati and back is a non-stop cross-cross of various public transport system modes and private vehicles. Eventually, I realize the fact that though I am travelling through the same road again, the feelings inside are not the same anymore. The romanticism of yore or the spontaneous strange feeling of one is gone.

And years later, in broad daylight, I remember those dimly-lit houses in the distance once again. A mental picture surfaces of the humble and lovely souls beneath them. About the lonely bus journey through the silence of night. Of the co-passengers who one never get to know. Who were so close yet so far. Of meeting loved ones on arrival at home. Of the sleepy emaciated teenage boy who dared to dream.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Good Times, Bad Times

There are good times. There are bad times. Both don’t continue in perpetuity. A good run always has an end. Bad predicaments too come to a close one day. This is the enigma of life.
My little experience has convinced me the above is true. There are times when I feel good with the way things are going for me. The achievements I made in different aspects keep my spirits high and I am on Cloud Nine. My confidence in my abilities grow and I have a positive attitude towards everybody. It rarely occured during such moments that something could go amiss. Then, suddenly, out of the blue, in the least expected way, something goes wrong, something as insignificant as committing a faux pas in an official meeting and the thoughts correspondingly go downhill. I rue over what I could have conveniently avoided with some carefulness on my part and not simply trusted people blindly. I then live over the bad feeling till nature take its own time to erase it from my consciousness and I remember them no more.
Strangely, there are also times when bad streak never seem to come to an end. One sour event is followed by another, one mistake is compounded by another and the mental load keep piling up. I once committed a silly mistake during my college days. The warden of my hostel misunderstood what I wanted to communicate to him. Thinking that I had a perception of him in a certain unfavourable light, he developed a bad impression about me. It made my life really unpleasant for the period he was there. It was difficult for me to tell him myself what my real intention was at that young age and time and reverse his thinking. Only somebody in kind gesture could do me that favour, for the sole reason that he would not believe me anymore. But, as mentioned earlier, bad times too come to an end. A new warden took over and my stay in the hostel are sweet memories now.  
The fact is that you cannot avoid the two phases of circumstances. It is not whether you like it or does not like it. To put it simply, this is the way of life. Good times come and go. Bad times prevail off and on. I agree, we have learned to accept this, but it is only that, being human we are hard-pressed when the going gets tough. There may be many ways to cope with such events. Lifestyle Gurus suggest measures which are appealing. Clinical Psychologists may also give scientific methods to overcome them or cope with them better. There are many more. But, what I feel beyond doubt is that coping with the Ups and Downs of life is easier when we cling to our Faith.  A murmur of prayer bring a lot more good than it seem potent. Needless to say, “ A little walk with Jesus is all we need ”, to help us carry on.
Maybe, a particular bad day prompted me to write. Maybe, a Lord’s day well-spent to talk of tiny footprints in faith.  Maybe, a mere expression of the passion to write. Maybe, a combination of all.